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10 Ways to Provoke Your Kids

December 10, 2008

Taken from Matt Schmucker of 9 Marks, here are 10 things we may be doing that polarize our kids. Alternatively, here are some other lists that can aid in encouraging and loving your kids well. Feel free to add your own wisdom in the comments.

  1. Make it a habit to discipline your child while angry.
  2. Make it a point to scold your child – especially in public. Mockery and ridicule work well.
  3. Deliberately embarrass your child in front of his/her friends. Name calling really gets their attention.
  4. Create double standards so that the child never knows who or what to follow.
  5. Preach and hold the child to a gospel of self-discipline instead of a gospel of grace. (Note: the Bible presents Pharisees as very unhappy people.)
  6. Never admit you’re wrong and never ask your children for forgiveness.
  7. Inspect your child until you find something wrong. Holding them to an unreachable standard makes this task easier.
  8. Judge a fight between your children before you’ve listened to them.
  9. Compare your child to others.
  10. Promise your children things early in the day and then don’t fulfill the promise.

Parents should provoke their children…in good ways: “And let us consider how we may spur one another on [provoke!] toward love and good deeds” (Heb. 10:24).

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. J. Brown permalink
    December 10, 2008 6:57 pm

    This list hits the nail on the head. While teaching in elementary school the past 3 years I’ve had to learn to avoid several of these points by realizing I am polarizing students and then stepping back to re-examine myself.

    I’m really excited that God has continued to work on me in this department before I’ve even begun parenthood.

  2. December 11, 2008 11:30 am

    thank you for this! healthy, very healthy.

  3. Sam permalink
    December 14, 2008 4:56 am

    Hmm, a list that every first generation Asian parent should read ;)

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